Children are the best distractions

This has been an unusually busy week. I had long hours for work, guests in from out of town and a missing husband. All of this combined can make for a bit of stress. My husband took off last Thursday for a "boys weekend". This is the almighty excuse men use to get out of the weekly family obligations for a long weekend. Unfortunately, for me, this "long weekend" ended up being nearly a week. After he left, my sister and her daughter (10 months) came by to visit. Needless to say, things were a bit out of control. Granted, we had fun with the kids, but after bedtime tended to be when the real fun began.

Okay - let me get to the heart of this post. After four days of my husband being gone and a good 40+ hour work week, my hubby gives me a call. At the moment the phone rang I was in the midst of giving Sam a bath (a bit distracted), but I was glad to hear from him. I start the obligatory small talk, "How's the trip", "Where are you off to now?". We cut the call short when it was obvious I was more involved in getting a clean diaper on my son than talking to my husband. Later (about 11:30PM)he called again. He asked what I was up to. I told him I was making homemade Strawberry Shortcake. His response, "So that's what you do on my birthday when I'm out of town?"

OH SHIT!!!! It was indeed his birthday! He had called earlier to test me, and again right before the end of day to make sure I didn't forget. I had. I tried to make light of it, but I was destroyed. I couldn't believe that I, the master of all things gifted, could forget such a milestone.

After a good 12 hours of grieving my mistake I make a homemade key lime pie and chocolate cake and got over it.

I guess it's easy to use your children as an excuse for being distracted, but they truly are the best at it. There is nothing like a screaming baby to take your mind off of everything you had in your brain only moments ago. That being said, it was an artful design. The baby should be the focus at that moment. It's nice to think that my son treasured my attention more than my husband would have appreciated my quick text saying, "Happy Birthday".

Stay at Home Mom or Working Mom???

I can't decide if I'm neither or both. I work from home. That alone says it all. I have a florist studio in my basement where I work a good 30-40 hours a week during my busy months and closer to 15 hours a week in the slow season, but whether I be busy or not at work, I'm always busy at home. Along with working with clients and making product I'm also doing laundry, kissing boo boo's and cleaning toilets not to mention breastfeeding every two hours. I feel so lucky to have so much time with my kids, but although it's a blessing, it's also a curse. Now that I have my fabulous children it takes me a good three hours to complete a one hour task.

I guilt myself constantly about not being a good enough business woman and also not giving my kids enough attention. You can't have it both ways! I have decided my priority is my children. Both my children are under three and I figure, as all mothers would say, "cherish this time, you'll never get it back." That being said, I still have to keep my business going and I feel like it's suffering.

Just because the dishes aren't done with in two hours of them being dirtied and my clients have to wait 48 hours to hear back from an e-mail does not make me a failure.

Maybe the worst part about it isn't the priorities I have to make or the tough decisions (do I cuddle my crying infant or finish the bridal bouquet). The worst part is that I get negativity from all ends. The Stay-at-Home Moms think I'm not spending enough time with my kids and the Working Moms think I'm not giving my business enough energy.

Often times I just need to take three steps back and give myself some credit. I am doing the best that I can. I AM a good mother AND a good business owner. I'm doing it all just fine.

So many little things - update

I'm embarrassed to admit that it only took me a minute or two on the internet to obtain the answer to my last blog's question - what about safer bottles and sippy cups?? I found the following blog which lists a number of brands that are commited to being BPA free. http://thegreenparent.blogspot.com/ Thanks to all those other savy bloggers out there!!

As for myself, I don't think it's worth the risk and will be switching over to non-BPA plastics or glass for Claire and Sam. There are too many variables in this life to not control the ones you can.

So many little things

I wouldn't say I am the most earth conscious person, but I do get concerned about exposing my children to toxins and all other undesirables. I have recently committed myself to using only eco-friendly cleaning products and am happy to report that diluted vinegar and baking soda can clean almost anything, and typically better than their asphyxiating counterparts. I have also worked hard to incorporate greener habits in doing dishes and laundry. I figure, as they say, every little bit counts. That being said, I still have concerns.

Sam, who's only four months old, is still taking a bottle of expressed milk when I'm away and I'm worried about the plastic bottles I'm using.

I was just reading on a fellow bloggers page, http://notquitecrunchyparent.blogspot.com/2008/05/safety-in-numbers-which-types-of.html that these bottles place a risk of our vulnurable infants ingesting chemicals which may lead to disease. I guess what I'm most interested in at this point is where I can obtain glass bottles as well as more information about what else I can do to make sure my children are protected.

I'm ashamed that we've become so concerned with a cheap product that we risk our health for it.

What doing??

I've already talked about dancing on the edge of insanity. Here's one more example of how I can get there. After months and months of wondering when my daughter will talk, she decided to start and never stop. She talks constantly now and knows more words than I probably give her credit for. She comes up with new concepts everyday, but there are a couple phrases that don't seem to get old for her. One of them is, "What is it?". Or in her language, "iz it". It's all the time, "iz it mommy, iz it?". Then of course I respond with amazing amounts of patience and answer, "that's a fountain, honey". Unfortunately, it doesn't end there. Almost immediately she comes up with, "What doing?". "It's spouting water" is a typical response. This goes on all day long and all night long and slowly wears you down. "What iz it mommy? Iz it? What doing mommy? What doing?? What doing? What iz it? Iz it mommy?" It goes on all day. Of course there are interruptions when she will be excited to realize she already knows the answer... like "Fountain mommy? Fountain? Spouting mommy?". To which I reply in a tired voice, "That's right babe, that's a fountain spouting water." I'm so glad she's learning new things every day and I'm really quite happy to help her with her lessons, but I would love it if we could find a new format for tomorrows class.

My beloved family vehicle

Please do not judge the mini van. It is indeed the best thing that has ever happened to family travel. I have just returned from a trip to visit my Mother-in-law and I must admit that my recent upgrade from my snazzy SUV to my large and in-charge mini van was the smartest thing I have done in a while (and that's saying something, as I am usually doing smart things).

There are so many wonderful amenities, it's hard to know where to start. Firstly, I can actually get to the back, where the kids are unhappily strapped in their travel torture devices, from the front seat without throwing out a shoulder. This enables me to stop at a frosty parking lot and instead of exposing my newborn to sub-zero temperatures to breast feeding uncomfortably in the drivers seat I just climb back and get cozy on the back bench seat.

Also, having a toddler who has just recently discovered the niceties of adult toilet habits, it is very handy to have a travel toilet in the car which is just waiting to be abused at any moment. Now, I know, the thought of a toddler peeing, or worse, in your vehicle may be a bit scary. But let me tell you ladies... there is nothing better than having a small potty at your disposal at any time, whether it be while driving down the highway or at the neighborhood park that has conveniently locked all the bathrooms.

There are also all the great little things, like a mirror to spy on the children in the rear, extra storage under the seats, more cup holders, and most importantly lots and lots of legroom. The list really does go on. Needless to say, I am one happy customer and sooooo glad I didn't wait another day.

Don't hate on the mini-van! It's not an embarrassment to be well prepared and comfortable while driving.

NEW NEW

So - What's with all these new electronic toys that kids get? Typically, although I may be the minority here, it seems these toys are purchased for my children as gifts, not by me. They usually have many different colored lights and sounds that quickly drive a parent insane. And I'm not exaggerating here. To elaborate, in the morning all is good in the world. The kids are happy, and I may even interact a bit - play with blocks or color a bit, but slowly as the day wears on, more and more of these electronic toys make their way out of the toy box and unto the floor. Not only is it a liability to have so many obstructions between the couch and the fridge (the two places I like to visit most in my house), but the noise coming from each one of these toys compounded one on top of the next makes a person crazy. First you think, "that's annoying, but I can deal". Then its, "Wow, that's a lot of noise... I can barley hear (insert activity here) - the other person on the phone, my TV show, myself think!!" Finally, instead of thinking to yourself you shout loudly, "If you don't put that toy away right now, it's going out the window!!" Then, of course, there is the quiet moment afterwards when you think, "Wow... that was intense... it was just a toy after all."

My daughter Claire has a new toy. It's a synthesizer and it has pre-recorded songs on it. All you need to do is press a button and soon there is blaring music to gallop or skip or dance to. Admittedly, Claire is the cutest thing in the world when she is hopping around the room but the music is unbearable. Her favorite of all is titled, "NEW NEW". What is that, and what does it mean? The tune itself is nothing that I've heard before which could be why it's titled "NEW NEW" but they could have made it easier on the parent and just called it "Annoying song that will inevitably make you loose your sanity." Or, if space was an issue, they could just abbreviate it to "Annoying Song".

I guess it's simple enough when your sanity is intact. You just need to sit back and enjoy the gallop.

Mother's Day

It's only fitting that my first blog is the day before Mother's Day. I couldn't take it another day reading about everyone elses children and not writing about my own. Everything changes so quickly and my memory just doesn't keep up with it. So I thought.... hmmmm... let's take time out of an already busy schedule to write down something that likely no one will read or appreciate. Great Idea!!

So here we are at Mother's Day. I did all the appropriate things, purchasing cheesy greeting cards for both my mother and my mother-in-law, and going through a 2 hour long torture session pacifying my 4 month old while my daughter, Claire, painted hieroglyphs unto unglazed pottery for a cute little art project for my mother-in-law to cherish (or so I hope).

Luckily, we made it through the endurance contest and although it merited a trip to the Ped's on the way home, everyone survived... and we have a cute little pot to show for it.

Now it's time for me to rush off to sleep so I can assuradly be woken up in 25 minutes by my hungry newborn.

HAPPY MOTHERS DAY !!